Marriage & the Gospel (Ephesians 5:22-33)
A biblical marriage is a covenant relationship between one man and one woman who are pursuing Christ together so that the gospel is proclaimed. Biblical marriages should be on display to a watching world. Unfortunately, the enemy knows that power of a biblical marriage and has worked extremely hard to mar this picture of Christ and the church.
The key to a biblical marriage is submission from man to God. Chapter 5:21 says, “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ”. As we are being filled daily by the Holy Spirit, we walk in a humility that is counter-cultural to the world. Verse 22 says, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” To submit means to arrange under like Adam as the head of Eve and like the redemption of Christ over the church.
The view of women in Ephesus at the time of Paul’s letter was horrible. Women were more like property owned than a partnership. They had no ability to leave. They were told to stay inside and be obedient. They were to be seen but not heard. Prostitution was acceptable. Men had multiple partners for “different tasks”. In the Roman culture, man was the god of his house. It was wrong.
The difference is that Paul is instructing women to “order under” their husbands as their husbands are “ordering under” Christ. There is a respect for the Lord when you respect and submit to your husband that is submitted to Him. Respecting your husband does NOT mean:
- Protecting their sin
- Being complicit to evil acts
- Cooperating in abusive behavior
Husbands have the responsibility of presenting their brides back to God better than they received them. That only happens in a trusting, honoring relationship with Christ at the center. Verse 25 commands husbands to “love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…”. This is a sacrificial love that means to seek the greatest good possible for someone else. Verse 26 calls husbands to sanctify their wives, which means wives would be “made holy” because of their husbands love and influence.
Verse 28 speaks to the mystery of becoming one. Men are to nourish and cherish their wives as he would care for himself. Then, in verse 31, Paul speaks again about this “one flesh” reality. This is a new intimacy. There is a new loyalty, and spouses are to “hold fast” like glue. The two truly become one.
Pastor Alex gave a 5D view of marriage:
- Pray daily – this is the engine to your marriage
- Date weekly – could be big or small. Just be intentional
- Depart often – try to get away together quarterly
- Dig in – commit to battle together
- Delight in her – she is worth it!
Discussion Questions:
- Why did you choose to marry your spouse?
- How have you seen the enemy at work in attacking marriages? Your marriage?
- We talk about men leading, loving, and serving their wives. Discuss what each of these mean.
- How are you doing on the 5D view of marriage listed above?
- Say to one another, “I would marry you again all day every day, and I thank God for His provision of you.”
- Pray together each day this week
- Marriages are made up of equal partners with different roles. What are those roles?
